Most breakups are quite messy, and the couple usually breaks contact with each other after a breakup, but sometimes some people end up living with their ex even after the breakup.
There could be various reasons behind it, and if you are considering dating someone who currently lives with their ex, you should be a little cautious.
It could mean a lot of different things. Maybe they are not over their ex, perhaps they are financially interdependent, or maybe it’s because of some circumstances that are out of their control.
It is something that you should be careful about, but you should not be too quick to judge someone and try to understand other persons’ perspectives and situations.
Whether you should date someone who lives with their ex is not easy to answer, and this question can’t be answered with a simple yes or no without knowing the whole situation.
So let’s discuss it in more depth.
Should you date someone who lives with their ex?
In general, you should avoid dating someone who lives with their ex if you don’t want to get yourself involved in something complicated, but in some cases, there could be a valid reason behind someone living with their ex, in which case you can consider going out with them.
If the person is living with their ex because of some genuine reason or because of reasons that are out of their control, then you can consider ignoring this, but in most other situations, you should avoid getting together with someone who is living with their ex.
Getting over an ex is never easy, especially if it was a serious relationship that lasted for a long time and if the person is still living with their ex after the breakup, that makes things even more complex.
Each person’s situation is different, and you’ll have to judge the person on your own, whether they are over their ex, whether their problem is genuine, or whether it reflects some personality trait you need to be aware of.
If you think the person is still somewhat attached to their ex or has not completely moved on, then it is best that you avoid getting yourself involved in this situation.
Can someone get over their ex while still living with them?
Technically speaking, it is possible for someone to get over their ex even if they are still living with them, but it’s not very common. Generally, it is much harder for people living with their ex to move on as they have to see and interact with them regularly.
If you have been in a relationship for a few months or years, then it is definitely not easy to move on immediately; it takes some time to get your ex out of your mind. But when you are living with them after the breakup, it becomes even more difficult to get over them.
If you are considering dating someone living with their ex, then the most important thing that you should know is whether they are completely over their ex or not, and if they are not, then you should avoid getting involved in this.
There are situations where people are forced to live with their ex. For example, if they were together for a long time and decided to buy a house together and now they are not together anymore, but none of them is financially capable of buying the other person’s share.
If the situation of the person you are thinking of dating is similar to this, then you can consider going out with them, and maybe you can find a solution to their problem together.
Signs that they have moved on from their ex:
Now you know that if you want to date someone who is living with their ex, you should make sure that they have moved on from their ex.
But how would you know if they have moved on?
Here are the signs that show that they have gotten over their ex:
They must have clear boundaries
Even if they are living together, they should have clear boundaries considering they are not together anymore.
When you are dating someone, the boundaries get blurred, which is fine but once broken up, one needs to understand that there have to be some boundaries between them if they are still living together.
If you are considering dating someone who lives with their ex, then it is very important for them to have healthy boundaries.
If they are not together anymore, then they should live like regular flatmates. They should not be going into each other’s rooms without asking or getting involved in each other’s personal lives.
It is something that you must pay attention to, and if they don’t have these healthy boundaries set, you either need to talk to them or avoid going out with them.
They don’t hide anything related to their ex from you
If you have met them a few times or maybe visited their place a couple of times, then you must pay attention if they are hiding anything related to their ex from you or not.
You should be very cautious if they try to avoid talking about their ex or trying to hide things about their ex from you.
If you are accepting them even though they are still living with their ex, then they also need to be transparent with you, and if they are not, then it’s best for you to avoid going out with them.
They have different living spaces.
If you are considering dating someone living with their ex, then the first thing that you should check is whether they have separate living spaces or not.
Even if they’re living in a small one-room apartment, that is no excuse for them to share a bedroom.
If they are still living in the same bedroom even after the breakup, then you should definitely avoid getting involved in such a situation.
It’s the least you can expect from someone living with their ex, and if they are sharing the same bed, then it’s a huge red flag that you must not ignore.
how to know if they are just friends after the breakup
Not all relationships end on a bad term. Some people just mutually decide to split ways and do remain friends afterward, and there is nothing wrong with it. In fact, it shows how mature the person is.
But how do you know if they are “just friends” after a breakup or more than that
well, here are a few ways to tell if they are really just friends after the breakup:
They don’t hide things about their ex
This is a telltale sign to know whether they are just friends or not. If they try to avoid conversation about their ex or hide things about them from you, then it’s a huge red flag.
If they are just friends after their breakup, then they will have no problem talking about it, and there will be no need to hide things from you.
They have emotionally moved on from their ex.
It’s fine if they have broken up on good terms and have become friends, but you should
You can easily sense from the way they talk about their ex or how they react in the presence of their ex whether they have actually moved on or not.
If you think they have moved on, then good, but if you think they have still not moved on and, on top of that, they are still sharing the same house, then it is a clear sign that you need to get yourself out of this mess.
They have a good reason for living with their ex.
It’s always strange to see exes living together after a breakup, but in some situations, it is acceptable if the reasons are understandable.
If the person you are thinking of dating is living with your ex and they say they are just friends now, then they must have a solid reason why they are still living with them.
If their reason is something stupid, like they can’t find another flatmate, then it’s a big red flag, and you should definitely avoid dating someone like that.
On the other hand, if they have a genuine reason then you can consider going out with them.
How to know if they are not over their ex
it’s quite easy to see if someone is still not over their ex; just by talking to someone for some time or by spending some time with them, you can understand if they are still stuck in their past.
One clear sign that they are not over their ex yet is if they never have deep or meaningful conversations with you.
If you feel that they are always thinking about something else even when they are with you, and they never indulge in deep conversations with you, then it might be a sign that they are not yet over their ex.
Other than that, if they act weird in front of their ex( who they live with) or get nervous or talk strangely whenever any topic about their ex comes up, then again, it could be a sign that they are not over their ex yet.
What to do if you don’t like them living together
If you don’t like them living with their ex, then it’s best that you avoid getting involved with them in the first place.
If you really like them and want to date them, then it’s best that you make it clear from the start that you don’t like them living with their ex.
It’s best that you have a talk with them before you start going out with them and let them know that they should figure out a solution for their problem and think of moving to a different place as soon as possible.
The Bottomline:
Most relationships have an ugly ending, but sometimes people do stay friends, and in some rare cases, you can also find some exes living together even after their breakup.
Whether you should consider dating someone who is living with their ex depends on various factors but generally, you should avoid getting involved in something like this.
Though in some cases, there could be a genuine reason for someone to be living with their ex, and if that is the case in your situation, too then you can consider going out with them.
